aku malas!!

Gila sedih bila tiba-tiba aku berada di dalam situasi ini. Jiwa kacau. Otak sasau. Hati meracau. Handphone off. Call – aku out!

Sampai bila nak jadi begini??? Hidup tak tenteram. Badan panas. Rasa nak demam. Kepala berdenyut. Migrain datang. Tekak perit. Lidah payau…penyakit perasaan nih!

Taubat! Aku tak mau lagi begini. Hidup mesti kuat. Dah kuat boleh BUNUH yang jahat-jahat. Baru rasa selamat.

Tapi sekarang aku tak larat. Nak tidur dulu hilangkan penat. Puas dah aku mengayat. Tapi tetap juga tak dapat-dapat.

Aku tau Allah nak duga. Juga nak bagi sedar. Jangan lagi aku lalai. Ikut suka bila nak pakai.

Sekarang semua back-off! Jangan racun fikiran aku lagi. Kalau nak, cari lah sendiri. Jangan suruh-suruh aku lagi. Mentang-mentang aku cepat kesian. Ini natijah yang engkau balas. Gunakan aku sepuas-puas. Time nak lunas kau diam tanpa belas. AKU MALAS!!

~enough for now!~

so close

After seeing Enchanted...I cannot stop humming to this song by John McLaughlin...so..here's the lyric...


You’re in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close

So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
And now you’re beside me and look how far we’ve come
So far we are so close

How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We’re so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far

Oh! Salam Maal Hijrah & Selamat Tahun Baru

~enough for now!~

bye bye

Had to say goodbye to Awan and Bayu. Send them back to where they came from. Pak Usu’s place. Can no longer keep them with us. It’s good of both Pak Usu and Mak Usu to accept them back.

I can see the sadness on Kinah’s face. Looking at Bayu but dare not touch for she is afraid that if she does, she could not let go. Tirah totally ignored Awan. With eyes all red. Trying very hard to be strong. Not looking back at him. Yaya cried when we finally had to go. She love them both. But she’s the reason why we had to send them back. Doctors do not permit. Adek wave happily. Not understanding the reason. She thought that we’re simply leaving them while we go travelling to Atok’s hometown for a few days. Not knowing the fact that she can no longer kick their cage to wake them up when she comes home every day from the nursery.

Mak Usu was so sweet to tell Yaya that she will keep calling the two kittens Awan and Bayu. And they will always be ours. She hope that we will always come to visit. And DIA promise to visit often. That finally made Yaya smiled.

~enough for now!~

why??

Kenapa ya aku masih di sini? Di ruang yang sangat bosan ini. Masih mengadap design-design yang ntah haper-haper. Melayan kerenah boss yang sudah tua. Dan isterinya yang seperti singa betina?

KERANA AKU MASIH PUNYAI KESABARAN.

Kenapa ya aku masih di sini? Sehingga ke hari ini masih belum dibayah upah. Masih belum diluluskan cuti. Masih belum diberikan saguhati. Masih ditaburi janji-janji manis?

KERANA AKU MASIH PUNYAI KESABARAN.

Kenapa ya aku masih di sini? Masih membiarkan diri diperbodohkan. Masih mendiamkan diri bila di hina. Masih menahan kemarahan dijiwa. Masih menafikan kebenaran yang nyata?

KERANA AKU MASIH PUNYAI KESABARAN.

Tapi sampai bila? DIA kata “angkat beg & blah je”.
Tapi boleh ke? DIA kata “buat je la”.
Tapi mampu ke? *Kenapa DIA diam saje*??

~enough for now!~

the perfect stranger...

It’s not about the movie… It’s about me… Had this chat with one of my cyber friend. Told her that a few of them akan meluahkan perasaan to me...(oh!..and they are girls, and i’m straight, hokey!). How lucky they are to have ‘the perfect stranger’ (macam lah aku bagus sangat..). The perfect person yang tak dikenali & yang tak mengenali mereka di alam kehidupan di luar sana. So it’s safe for them to bare out their soul to. The best friend from hell???.. jgn la!..I’m not like that tau!

To all my ‘sahabat’,… are u willing to be my ‘perfect stranger’ too??

~enough for now!~